Category Archives: Quotes

Howard Wolowitz best quotes in the big bang theory

Quote from the …

Howard: Why should I do something nice for you?
Sheldon: To go to Jewish heaven.
Howard: Jews don’t have heaven
Sheldon: To avoid Jewish Hell?
Howard: Have you met my mother? I live in Jewish Hell

Quote from the episode The Hawking Excitation

Quote from the …

Penny: Okay, help me out here. How does an archaeology professor get that good with a whip?
Howard: Maybe he took a class at the adult bookstore. That’s how I learned.

Quote from the episode The 21-Second Excitation

Howard: Are …

Howard: Are you planning on kidnapping a woman?
Sheldon: Sarcasm?
Howard: Yes, but mixed with genuine concern.

from the episode The Plimpton Stimulation

Quote from the …

Howard’s mom: Howard it’s the phone!
Howard: I know it’s the phone ma’ I HEAR THE PHONE!
Howard’s mom: Who is calling at this ungodly hour?
Howard: I don’t know!
Howard’s mom: Well ask them why are they calling at this ungodly hour!
Howard: HOW CAN I ASK THEM WHEN I’M TALKING TO YOU!?. *on the phone* Hello?

Quote from the episode The Pancake Batter Anomaly

Leonard: What w…

Leonard: What would you do if you were me?
Wolowitz: I would take Sheldon to Switzerland!
Leonard: Really?
Wolowitz: Yes, and I’d leave him there!

I am a horny en…

I am a horny engineer, I never joke about math or sex.

Quote from the episode The Hofstadter Isotope

If it’s “creepy…

If it’s “creepy” to use the Internet, military satellites, and robot aircraft to find a house full of gorgeous young models so I can drop in on them unexpected, then fine, I’m “creepy”.